My Dad was a successful journalist. He loved life and he loved talking. Sadly, he also loved smoking and drinking. Which is why, in 1979, he had his tongue removed along with the tumour that had grown all the way down his throat. He survived, due to the dedication of two amazing surgeons. But his life was never the same again.
Below is an excerpt from an article I wrote in a national women's magazine at the time.
'We all remember Humphrey Bogart, Jack Hawkins, Steve McQueen, John Wayne, Diana Dors - the cast is endless. They all died in a blaze of publicity. But there are other, less well-know victims whose lives go on day by day - those who the doctors have saved from cancer but not from themselves.
In 1979 my father went into hospital for major surgery on a growth on his tongue. Six weeks later a man who bore my father's name returned home. The lively, gregarious, good looking man had been reduced to a shrivelled, mutilated wreck. The surgeons had saved his life but they had lost sight of his dignity.
His operation was very much an experiment, and he is still counting the cost. They removed his tongue (he is a journalist) and mutilated his face leaving him totally unable to speak and unrecognisable as the man he was before. He can talk now and he tells me in muted, muffled tones what it is like to be stared at by adults, jeered at by children - 'Been in a car crash have ya mister?' and regarded as a freak by the world around him.
Medical science has, of course, moved on since then. But what I didn't say in that article was that my father was terrified of dentists after waking up during a tooth extraction when he was a boy. He knew he had a 'sore' in his mouth but put off having it checked out until it was too late.
I'd like to think that telling his story today might help save someone's life.
Mouth Cancer Action Month is here to make people aware of this frightening disease. Please don't think it won't happen to you.
You can find out more about Mouth Cancer Action Month on Mouth Cancer Foundation
Harry Brown in 1969 outside the Football League in Lytham St Annes Lancashire where he was Public Relations officer |
Below is an excerpt from an article I wrote in a national women's magazine at the time.
'We all remember Humphrey Bogart, Jack Hawkins, Steve McQueen, John Wayne, Diana Dors - the cast is endless. They all died in a blaze of publicity. But there are other, less well-know victims whose lives go on day by day - those who the doctors have saved from cancer but not from themselves.
In 1979 my father went into hospital for major surgery on a growth on his tongue. Six weeks later a man who bore my father's name returned home. The lively, gregarious, good looking man had been reduced to a shrivelled, mutilated wreck. The surgeons had saved his life but they had lost sight of his dignity.
His operation was very much an experiment, and he is still counting the cost. They removed his tongue (he is a journalist) and mutilated his face leaving him totally unable to speak and unrecognisable as the man he was before. He can talk now and he tells me in muted, muffled tones what it is like to be stared at by adults, jeered at by children - 'Been in a car crash have ya mister?' and regarded as a freak by the world around him.
Medical science has, of course, moved on since then. But what I didn't say in that article was that my father was terrified of dentists after waking up during a tooth extraction when he was a boy. He knew he had a 'sore' in his mouth but put off having it checked out until it was too late.
I'd like to think that telling his story today might help save someone's life.
Mouth Cancer Action Month is here to make people aware of this frightening disease. Please don't think it won't happen to you.
Mouth Cancer Action Month
1 - 30 November 2015
What is Mouth Cancer Action Month?
Mouth Cancer Action Month is a charity campaign which aims to raise awareness of mouth cancer and make a difference by saving thousands of lives through early detection and prevention.…You can find out more about Mouth Cancer Action Month on Mouth Cancer Foundation
11 comments:
Marilyn, this is a very sad and moving post. I hope you succeed in raising awareness. :)
A brave post. I'm sorry to hear your father's story. I know what he went through as I used to work with people with oral cancer (still do sometimes) as a speech therapist. I'm glad to say that speech and swallowing function is now very much higher on the agenda when considering treatment options. The sad fact is that oral cancers are increasing so I applaud any awareness campaigns that may help people realise they need to get something odd or suspicious checked out. Early detection usually means much less invasive treatment.
Thanks, Lindsay. I really appreciate your comments. It's good too know that speech and swallowing are so much more important these days - it means a much happier outcome for those who are affected. Dad would have been the first to support this campaign - I hope lots of other people do.
Good to hear from you, Heather. Please spread the awareness, wherever you can. x
A brave and incredibly emotive post...I'm so sorry for your loss, Marilyn. I lost my own Dad 6 months ago to cancer...it turned him into a shadow of the Man I knew before. It's heartbreaking...my heart is still breaking (as I imagine is yours).
This is an important awareness piece, Thank you for writing so openly about your Dad.
All the best, Kimmie x
I am really sorry to read about your dear Father Marilyn. It is wonderful, and brave of you, to write this to make people aware of oral cancer.
At the age of 48yrs, my eldest daughter lost her battle with jaw cancer. Her battle was heartbreaking. She too, left it too late before she sought help.
I applaud people like you. My heartfelt thanks .. Rosy x
That is a very, very sad loss for you and my heart goes out to you, Rosy. We wand to protect our daughters but, however much we love them, it is not always possible. You know she will always be with you in your heart. x
Kimmie - I already follow your posts but had no idea your loss was so recent. I hope the pain lessens over time and the happy memories take over. Thanks for your support - it means a lot to me.
Marilyn a very sad post but i am sure other people will read your fathers story and go and see the doctor after reading it also what a good time to make people aware of oral cancer.
Thanks. I was hoping to make it positive as well as sad - my father didn't die of cancer so it' never to late. The more people read this the more I hope it will help.
I was very sad to read about your dad Marilyn but raising awareness is always a good thing.
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