When my second daughter was sixteen, a gypsy told her she was going to marry a Yorkshireman. I laughed. Not because I had anything against Yorkshire, (or its men) but she was still so young and, anyway, who could predict such a thing? What's more she would work in a big factory surrounded by lots of people - including her future husband.
That was more than twenty years ago, yet the gypsy's words were as clear as ever as her father and I embarked on our latest trip to York. This beautiful city is famous the world over but I wonder how many of its people appreciate how lucky they are to live there? Or believe that my gypsy friend really knew what she was talking about? (Daughter Two, a happily married mum, is now a microbiologist in the city.)
Yes, the predictions came true. Yet I've always believed in the 'Sliding Doors' theory that we can, if we really want to, influence our own destiny. Otherwise, why are we here? As a writer it is easy to be self-critical, to compare yourself unfavourably to those who are more prolific than you, or more successful, especially in these days of non-stop social media. So I've tried to live by the mantra: if you think you can, you can, and if you think you can't, you probably can't.
One of the things I promised myself earlier this year was to concentrate on what I really want to do (write novels) and spend less time interacting with those I believe make my goal achievable (everyone else.) So, after writing this blog almost every week for the last seven years, I have decided to cut it down to once a month. I have taken a break from my facebook account, leaving only my author page active. I still log on to twitter, but just for a few minutes each day, so that I can keep in touch with what's gong on around me.
Do I feel happier? No, I feel quite bereft. I've taken away the crutches, hobbled out of my comfort zone and started to rely on myself again. But isn't that how it all started?
From cub reporter to freelance journalist, from mother to grandmother to novelist, I've tried to make things happen. That's my story, anyway. You don't have to believe it. Novelists, so I've heard, are good at making things up.
That was more than twenty years ago, yet the gypsy's words were as clear as ever as her father and I embarked on our latest trip to York. This beautiful city is famous the world over but I wonder how many of its people appreciate how lucky they are to live there? Or believe that my gypsy friend really knew what she was talking about? (Daughter Two, a happily married mum, is now a microbiologist in the city.)
Yes, the predictions came true. Yet I've always believed in the 'Sliding Doors' theory that we can, if we really want to, influence our own destiny. Otherwise, why are we here? As a writer it is easy to be self-critical, to compare yourself unfavourably to those who are more prolific than you, or more successful, especially in these days of non-stop social media. So I've tried to live by the mantra: if you think you can, you can, and if you think you can't, you probably can't.
One of the things I promised myself earlier this year was to concentrate on what I really want to do (write novels) and spend less time interacting with those I believe make my goal achievable (everyone else.) So, after writing this blog almost every week for the last seven years, I have decided to cut it down to once a month. I have taken a break from my facebook account, leaving only my author page active. I still log on to twitter, but just for a few minutes each day, so that I can keep in touch with what's gong on around me.
Do I feel happier? No, I feel quite bereft. I've taken away the crutches, hobbled out of my comfort zone and started to rely on myself again. But isn't that how it all started?
From cub reporter to freelance journalist, from mother to grandmother to novelist, I've tried to make things happen. That's my story, anyway. You don't have to believe it. Novelists, so I've heard, are good at making things up.
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| York Minster - the world at its feet? |
10 comments:
Wow, perhaps that gypsy really could see into the future. A friend and I visited a psychic some years ago. We had heard really good things about her, and we were prepared to pay a considerable amount of money in the hope she could see into our futures. She told me my then daughter in law was expecting a baby girl. The pregnancy turned out to be accurate, but I don’t think Tristan would be amused to be called a girl. She also said my mum would live until her ninetieth year she died in her seventies and worse than that she said I would soon marry a Canadian man called Michael. I was and still am married to Terry, and I’ve yet to meet a Canadian man called Michael or otherwise! I can’t remember the predictions she gave my friend, but I do know none of them came true.
I agree with you about influencing our own destiny and maybe if I had set out to look for Canadian Michael, I might have found him but would my life have been any happier? I don’t think so, and it could have been a lot worse.
I feel bereft every time I stop blogging. I try to go without Facebook, but I miss it too much as for Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest, I’ve become dependent – oh but the time it all wastes.
Reading your reply was like reading a newsy letter, Barbara - interesting and very welcome. I have had several moments in my life where predictions have come true, but I do think there are a lot of 'psychics' who get lucky then think they can do it again. This can be detrimental, as you've discovered. Good for Terry and Tristan is what I say!
Strangely, I had been thinking earlier of turning one of my experiences into a short story and submitting it to a psychic magazine. There are so many things I want to do and, like you, blogging is definitely one of them.
Finally, were aren't wasting our time on facebook and blogger, are we? We're using it positively! Looking forward to reading your next post. xx
Oh! My! Goodness! Love this...l could go on for ever! :).
HeHe! No! I promise l won't...Just one thing though....
if you think you can, you can, and if you think you
can't, you 'still' can..! The word 'probably' has no 'write'
to be their..!
Dare l say it...l'm very much proof of my life, from day one!
An only Sicilian child...Mia Mama, as all Sicilian Mamas,
raise their boys, as they would raise their girls...! So l
learned to cook, sow, keep house, do hair, and, many more
things that in fact became useful in later life, like being
a single parent, raising my daughter on my own for 14yrs!
But, my life, like everyone's life has been a roller~coaster,
at the end of it all...one other word takes over....that word
is....FATE!
What a positive attitude you have to fate, Willie. What a positive attitude you have to life. Sounds to me like you have always known where you were going and what you wanted to do!
HaHa! Yes! An old friend of mine used to say...
"That Willie..He's a Kit~Kat...straight down the middle,
straight as a dye, he's not a curly~wurly".
Bless Him!
Oh! And keep Blogging..even if it is once a month...! :0).
I hope you will write that short story Marilyn and maybe share a little of it on your blog and just like Willie I hope you keep on blogging. I miss you when you are away. xx
Ahh but of course you haven't made up your "life story". What you have done, however, is charmed us all with the way in which you describe it. That gift has translated to your novels and is why they are such compelling reading Marilyn. I do hope, like those who have commented previously, that you will entertain us again in the future with your short stories and also look forward to reading your monthly blog. In the meantime, enjoy the respite that you have created for yourself and be sure to look out for any sliding door or gypsy moments that come your way ..... who knows what might happen?
Just a quick follow up to York and Yorkshire...
Earlier on BBC Breakfast, they stated that
Parliament, later to~day will discuss the
possibility of giving Yorkshire more independence,
Steph is reporting from York at the moment, getting
different opinions from residents...!
Quite a bit on line about it as well...!
Great to know that! Here's to the Independence of Yorkshire! ;)
Thanks, Elaine, for your encouragement. I do hope the gypsies approve of me taking time out!
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